We hear a lot today about needing validation from others, but how often do we talk about the importance of self-reinforcement? In a world that increasingly fixates on external approval of others through likes, shares, and comments, the importance of embracing self-reinforcement for motivation and resilience is more critical.

Self-reinforcement is when you reward yourself for achieving certain goals or achieving a step toward something important to your well-being, fulfillment, success, etc. It originates in behavioral psychology with the idea that positive feedback can shape our behavior. What counts as a “reward” can vary widely from person to person—it could be anything from a small purchase you've been eyeing, a leisurely break to engage in a hobby you love, etc.

Whatever you choose, the goal is to find a positive, healthy reward that genuinely motivates you to keep you focused on your goals.

As you are engaging positive rewards, consider these:

🎉 Set Realistic Goals: It's important to use self-reinforcement in the context of having realistic goals and selecting rewards that are both meaningful and proportionate to your achievements. Perfection is an unattainable goal that only leads to disappointment. Aim for progress, not perfection.

🎁 Be Kind to Yourself: To help in motivating yourself, become aware of your inner dialogue. How do you talk to yourself? Are your thoughts filled with criticism or encouragement? Shifting this inner dialogue from negative to positive is the cornerstone of self-reinforcement. This doesn’t mean ignoring areas for improvement but rather, approaching them from a perspective of growth rather than self-deprecation.

🎈 Add Gratitude: By focusing on what we are thankful for in our lives, including our own qualities and actions, we shift our mindset from one of scarcity to abundance. This abundance mindset encourages a more compassionate view of ourselves, fostering a deeper appreciation for our journey and achievements.

Self-reinforcement is not just about feeling good in the moment; it’s about building our resilience and confidence so we can withstand the challenges of life. By fostering a positive relationship with oneself, you can open the door to genuine happiness and a more fulfilling life.